Also, my glasses. SIGH. My lovely, adorable glasses became a pain in the ass because of the glare they created if I moved my head from a different angle than I had been in when I first set up the lights. Sure, I could have removed the glare in Photoshop, but the whole point of this exercise was to try and get over my fears and make a real effort to get the photo I wanted without a ton of editing. So I made the adjustments when I wanted to, and I let there be a glare when I wanted to. I just knew I didn't want to take off my glasses.
And I didn't want to wear makeup or dress up or do my hair. If you know me, you know that I'm lower than low maintenance. Don't get me wrong, I like to think I clean up nicely for special occasions or going out for dinner. But when I'm home, when I'm with my family and close friends just hanging out, I'm pretty Plain Jane. I don't hide it in my every day life, so why bother trying to hide it in my self-portrait?
In the end, I went with a mix of different types of faces and poses, trying to loosen up with each shot. I played with some longer exposures, some non-centered poses, and how much shadow I allowed the lights to create. Although I'm referring to this as a personal mini-challenge, I'm not framing the end result as "win" or "lose". I didn't expect to walk away with a mind-blowing self-portrait. The larger goal was to give it a go and just sit down in front of the camera. The "me" you're seeing in these photos is probably a more honest "me" than the Selfies I usually post on Instagram or Facebook (and look, no toddler in the photo with me!). I feel like the Selfie isn't so much for the subject of the photo as it is for the audience; but the self-portrait is so intimate that it's really for the subject while the audience's reaction is superfluous. If they like it, they like it. If not, at the very least, you learn something about the subject without a single word spoken.
I'm older. I'm tired. I don't always feel like smiling. I still make funny faces at the world in self-defense. Sometimes I just hide. But I'm trying.
That's "something", right?